Oh, the challenges of raising a gluten free kid! Especially if your child has Celiac Disease. Children are constantly eating throughout the day and each morsel that goes in their mouths must be gluten free. That is the ultimate challenge.

Depending on the age level, kids are not going to understand why they can’t that delicious, hot pizza right in front of them on the table, the sumptuous bread piping hot out of the oven and the delectable, moist doughnut at the bakery. They are not going to know the difference between what foods are gluten free and what foods are not. They are just hungry and they want to eat right now!! Their desire to eat food with gluten will be accompanied by crying, whining and all out fits – especially in public – most likely in public.

What are you to do to prevent this from happening? What can you do? How do you make this gluten free diet easier on your child and help them thrive?

You may not be able to believe this, but this challenge is not about your child, and their diagnosis and gluten free diet; it’s about you. It is all about you and how you parent your child.

First, you need to know the disease your child has been diagnosed with. Research it, study it and become proficient. At Gluten Free the Way to Be, we have a “Thriving Gluten Free Course” that walks you through 6 steps to becoming gluten free and thriving. Step 2 in the course is called “Educate don’t Agitate” and it gives you a solid knowledge of how to eat gluten free and what celiac disease is. Information is power and knowledge about your child’s disease will empower you to know how important it is to have them constantly stay on their gluten free diet. You need to know the short-term effects of cheating on a gluten free diet and the long-term effects. Check out Gluten Free the Way to Be blog article, “What Really Happens When You Cheat on Your Gluten Free Diet.” If you truly understand the long-term effects of gut damage and potential for developing other diseases when you continually get gluten when diagnosed with celiac disease, you will understand why this cannot be an option for your child.

Second, be aware of yourself. Are you aware of how you are parenting? Are you unable to say “No” to your child even if it is best for them? Are you worried about what other people will think of you? You are going to be in uncomfortable situations and you need to develop your own self-resilience. This is huge! This is where you are going to be able to help your child the most. Your love for your child will be shown the very most by not giving in to their wants and demands. It will be shown by caring about their health more than you do about inconveniencing the many people you will. It is about how you empower your child to do what is very best for them. Stand strong with your decisions. Your child’s health is the very most important factor in any situation.

Third, the #1 guideline in raising a thriving gluten free kid, is…..consistency. This is where the behavior of your child is solely on you. Yes, you. It is how you handle this situation, over and over and over again. You will be in this situation, daily. Do you vacillate? Are you sometimes going to stand strong and say “No” to gluten while other times, you decide it’s alright because it is an uncomfortable public situation, or your child wants the food so much? This will create a miserable child. They do not have the ability to understand why sometimes it is acceptable to eat gluten free and other times it is not. Even worse, the times you say no but after their pleadings, you give in and say yes will create a nightmare situation ready to unfold every time because children catch on to your weakness and they will exploit you every time. It’s human nature and they will throw tantrums equal to whatever it takes to get you to give in.

“A child has to know first of all and beyond any shadow of doubt that the word spoken will be the word carried out,” wrote Elizabeth Elliot in her book, “Let Me Be a Woman.” She continues, this goes along with following through on your threats and your promises.

 A child will thrive when they know what they can expect from their parents and it is always the same. If they feel uncertain, their lives will feel chaotic and this will cause tantrums in order for them to feel in control of their lives and get what they want.

So, you must never, ever give in. You must draw a line in the sand; you will never knowingly give in and give your child a food that contains gluten. If they have celiac disease, this is an absolute must. But with any gluten free diet for a child, you still have to stay committed or else you will go through this over and over again. You can never vacillate or hesitate. You have to always stick to your plan and know ahead of time what you are going to do and be prepared.

Fourth, teach the why. Yes, even small children can understand on simple terms why that food containing gluten will hurt their tummies and their entire bodies. As they start to get older, you can progressively teach them about their disease and what foods have gluten in them and what foods are gluten free, how to read labels and talk with adults about the food they are going to eat. You will empower your children with knowledge so they can be their own advocates and choose to eat gluten free on their own when you are not around. Teach them to fish so they can take care of themselves all their lives.

Fifth, be prepared. One responsibility of raising a child is provide food so they don’t go hungry. This is ever more important with providing gluten free food. You can never let your child go hungry because there is no gluten free food available; this just cannot happen regularly. You must always be prepared. You will need to carry gluten free food for your child on your person or on their person, via a purse, backpack, car, at grandma’s house, in their school classroom etc. This has to be a priority in your life in order for your child to have a healthy relationship with food. It is hard enough for them to always be eating something different but to not have any food at all will create situations that can hurt your child psychologically. You completely control this aspect of the gluten free diet and the disease your child has. So be organized and have gluten free food everywhere your child goes. Have your pantry stocked regularly with gluten free food. Don’t leave your house without gluten free food. Pack gluten free lunches every day and have them with your child so they always have something. Call ahead to friends’ houses for what they will be eating at their parties and bring an equivalent gluten free food. Do this for all your kid’s events. Try to bring an equivalent gluten free food for what is being served. Call ahead to restaurants and check their online menus to ensure they will accommodate eating gluten free.

Now, if you don’t have gluten free food available once in a while, your child will understand that it was unpreventable. They will be okay. Remember that the #1 guideline in raising a thriving gluten free kid is consistency. So not only do you need to be consistent with not ever letting them eat gluten containing foods you always need to be consistent to always providing gluten free foods. Flip this around to a positive – a silver lining. There are lots of gluten free food that is so delicious. Gluten Free the Way To Be has many options for you to make gluten free food, buy the best gluten free food, learn about living gluten free and much more. Feel empowered with this help. You can learn the skills necessary to having a thriving gluten free kid. This is so important and Gluten Free The Way To Be is here to help you and for your child. You are not alone!